"Irrigation of the land with seawater desalinated by fusion power is ancient. It's called rain."

"Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope."

"Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love."

"Reality is only just a word."

"Inanimate objects are classified scientifically into three major categories - those that don't work, those that break down and those that get lost."

"Our Constitution protects aliens, drunks, and U.S. senators."

"An orator is a man who says what he thinks and feels what he says."

"Never chase a lie. Let it alone, and it will run itself to death."

"We don't know what we want, but we are ready to bite somebody to get it."

"The secret of success is for a man to be ready for his opportunity when it comes."